Love Pursuit

Google images. Source: Pinterest

The pursuit of love… not human love but Godly love. That’s what I need and where I have been going wrong. All this time I have been thinking the inner void and loneliness was because of my singleness and that maybe once I had a partner things would change. Boy oh boy have I been wrong 😔

I have just recently realised that I have been lacking something. Something nothing I or any other human can provide me with. I have been going through a cycle of things, overwhelming emotions. All of which have led to the making of wrong choices, a shift in focus to all the wrong things. 

Besides trying my best to avoid sin, I am human and find myself slipping out a few lies every once in a while, bad speech, ill thoughts and intentions. And even though those things are somewhat easy to tame/control I have been unable to maintain a steady relationship with God.

Yes I’m Christian, yes I read my Bible every day, yes I do good and avoid “great sin”, yes, yes, yes all sin is equal but we humans have a tendency to make some sins seem worse than others but that’s beside the point. 
Despite my efforts to right my wrongs with God, I still feel so far away from Him. 
Got the title of this post from the song ‘Love Pursuit’ by V. Rose. Heard it for the first time in Grade 12 and it touched me instantly the day I listened to it sitted on the floor in Chanozya’s room. She was the head-girl in school and we female prefects had gathered in her room as she was playing V. Rose’s album. I asked her to repeat the song for me because the message ‘til date still moves me. It talks about a person who wants to love God and have a relationship with Him but they feel they can’t go to Him because they are impure and have done way too much to be loved by God. But God tells the person that He doesn’t care about what’s been done in the past. He wants us as we are, with all our faults, scars, sins, flaws and all so He can fix us. The song is in the form of a conversation between the person and God, an excerpt of it is:

God: Even though you are unworthy you can still come to me. 
Person: No I’m too ashamed of me. God: But my love can cover all. Person: But how can you still love me after all that I’ve done to you? 
God: That’s why I sent my son for you. 
Person: But what if my heart should shake? 
God: Then I’ll pursue you with love and grace…

Imagine guys… being pursued with love and grace 😍. Who wouldn’t want that???

So that’s my pursuit. A thirst quenching, soul fulfilling, undying and unquestionable love affair. One with God. Because even though self love is key, I must also be willing to accept God’s love for me so He can fix me and help me fix myself before I can do anything else.

What's your pursuit? (Don’t say happiness because Will Smith beat you do it 😋)